Under the heading New and Noteworthy, my kindle has the book Bliss and the Art of Forever by Alison Kent and it has been under this heading for the past several weeks and it makes me wonder if the Amazon people don't have other books to advertise to me. I have never clicked the link to the book to see what the book is about, so maybe my distaste, based solely on the title, of the book could be premature. I might read it and find it very interesting. I don't believe in forevers. Especially blissful forevers. And this could be the reason why the presence of the book and the fact that Amazon has decided to put it there makes me resent them.
Now, you may think I am very cynical. I am not. I don't believe in forever. That doesn't mean I don't believe in the longevity of love. I do. I also believe in the uncertainty of tomorrows. This is what makes life worth living. Looking forward to a tomorrow in which you don't know what might happen. True, sometimes all we do is breath, sometimes we meet people we never knew existed, sometimes our tomorrow is just a replica of our today and yesterday. But in all these, there is always an element of surprise invisible to those who don't look closely. That is why I believe the concept of forever as a destination is a misguided one. The heart, with which we trust our love and decisions of our future love lives, is very fickle, it changes it's mind for reasons we might never understand- if you can explain the human heart, maybe we should be friends. I am usually very wary of people who promise each other forevers, and forever being nearly not long enough for them to be together.
Forever as a journey, though, is a concept I am willing to explore. Taking each day in stride, acknowledging that sometimes when we talk about our dreams for the future, what we are doing is not necessarily crafting a lifetime together, or trying to accommodate each other in the dreams we had before our paths crossed. What we are doing may be preparing ourselves for our eventual parting. But that doesn't have to mean that we shouldn't enjoy the present. The present that has brought us together and which prepares us for the future that may or may not include each other. So when I say don't ever make me promises, it doesn't mean that I don't want a future with you. What it means is that I am enjoying you today, with the hope that I will still enjoy you tomorrow, but I am taking each day as it comes.
The title of this post is from the song Promises Promises by Incubus.
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